In the Twilight Zone ?

A column by Dana Milbank in the Washington Post has me scratching my head and wondering if I went to sleep last night and woke up today in another dimension, a dimension of sight and sound and mind. Apparently there are Republicans speaking ON THE RECORD and saying that Ronald Reagan might not be welcome in today's GOP. I've spent more than twenty years watching Republicans pushing and shoving each other in disputes over which one is the TRUE HEIR TO THE LEGACY OF RONALD REAGAN. Now they act like he wouldn't be a player in the party ? Well, I guess it had to happen. After all, these are the same people who have turned on G.W. Bush like he has acne, leprosy and a bad case of gas.

Rick in the news

I bought the local newspaper today because I had an urge to work the Monday NYT crossword puzzle (the only one that's easy to finish). Since I had shelled out the 50 cents, I started reading the news and came across an Associated Press article written by somebody named Tomlinson making the point that if Rick Perry enters the 2012 presidential race, he'd be one of the most conservative of the GOP candidates, maybe THE most.

To repeat myself, Perry is already running... he just hasn't made an official announcement. I figure it this way -- once he thinks he's got enough support to stroll to the nomination, he'll announce he's in the race. If things work out so that he fears an ass-kicking, he'll drop out of sight and pretend he wasn't interested in the first place. No way this fucking egomaniac wants to finish his career as a loser, and if he runs for president and doesn't make it all the way to the White House, he's a loser with a capital L. If he loses one-on-one to Obama, his political career is over, kaput, finis. The same holds true for any Republican who finishes second to that N.

The article went on to discuss all the glorious ways in which Perry is the poster boy for everything that sucks about American conservatism in the 21st century. There's no half-assed right-wing bullshit that Rick hasn't bought into. Something that sticks out is Perry's belief in intelligent design. That alone should disqualify him from further consideration for national office.

In another article I read online in the Austin American Statesman, Perrito implies he's hearing the voice of divine guidance, and that he's getting comfortable with the idea he's being "called" to serve as President, which is what America needs.

Sorry, Ricardo. American NEEDS gasoline at a buck ninety-nine per gallon, an unemployment rate under five percent, a few first-rate sitcoms on TV, and great discounts on BMWs and Audis. It DOESN'T need a cheesedick who denies the theory of evolution and makes George W. Bush look moderate by comparison. As we say in Texas, STFU and GFY.

Lunatic Fringes

Last night, I decided to kill an hour watching Lawrence O'Donnell's show on MSNBC. One of the topics he covered was the pledge some hardcore rightwing group is trying to get all the GOP presidential candidates to sign, promising to honor their marriages and similar horseshit. An article in USA Today says that Mitt Romney and Tim Pawlenty have announced they won't be signing the pledge.

I almost feel sorry for Mormon Mitt. There was a time when people like him ran the Republican Party, and being a Republican didn't necessarily mean that you were crazier than a shithouse rat. Those days are fading fast -- the new GOP stars are flaming assholes like Bachmann, and to get any traction whatsoever, the Romneys and Pawlentys of the party have to lower themselves to her level. With that in mind, it's a little reassuring that Mitt and Tim have respectfully declined to sign the pledge.

Added 11:00 pm, Friday 15 July:

Okay, I gave Timmy Pawlenty too much credit too soon. My bad. Talking Points Memo reports on the level of desperation the Timster must be experiencing as he watches Crazy Eyes Bachmann suck the air out of his sails in Iowa. Default ? Okay, been there, done that. In Minnesota.

Discipline

If America ever restores the practice of punishment by public flogging, I want to be in charge of designating people to be horsewhipped in the town square. I'm already keeping a list of names and adding to it daily.

Hot topics on talk radio

While I was out driving around this afternoon, I decided to listen to a few minutes of Sean Hannity's rightwing gabfest on AM radio... just for old times' sake, you understand. For the ten minutes or so I was tuned in, the hot topic under discussion was Michele Bachmann and the terrible way she's being treated by the liberal mainstream media. Bachmann is a lot like that other broad, Sarah somebody, and tries to jazz up her speeches with references to history not as it was, but as she wishes it had been.

Like the other broad, Bachmann can't just smile sheepishly and admit she misspoke -- she makes herself look even dumber by jumping through all kinds of hoops to prove she was right the first time, and everybody else, including prominent historians, is WRONG, WRONG, WRONG.

God save us all if this bimbo ever wins any election other than the one for her cheesy little seat in the House.

Super idea

I was skimming through reader comments at the USA Today website and came across this one:

"I expect Congresswoman Bachmann to eventually run as an independent Tea Party candidate for 2012."

The more I think about this possibility, the more appealing it becomes. It would give me actual data on the size and influence of the Tea-dium Party, and it would siphon off votes that would otherwise go to the GOP nominee.