Reorganization Through Vaporization

 For several years dating back to the Bush 43 administration, I've been convinced the United States could be vastly improved if we had a vigorous vaporization program in place. When I visualize this program, I'm part of a small group of civil servants sharing an amazing supernatural ability to vaporize other people, places or things by wanting it to happen and concentrating on it really hard. 

Consider the improvement in America that would occur if we reorganized Congress, the Supreme Court and red state governments by issuing ultimatums to any members whose loyalty is to Donald Whutzatsmell or Russia instead of American democracy: Either resign and exile yourself to an Eastern European shithole - or be transformed to the natural equivalent of a huge Trump fart in a process taking less than fourteen seconds.