What I Believe

I'm rapidly becoming convinced that the following things are true:

• Donny Ringworm is a Russian asset, chosen by Putin because he's lazy, corrupt, and incompetent, i.e., perfectly suited for the mission -- rapidly destabilizing the United States, and permanently diminishing its prestige as a world leader. As his reward for turning a powerful nation into a third world shit hole, Donny got what he really wanted all along; to be the biggest TV star on earth and the center of attention every hour of every day. The chance to pocket millions of taxpayer dollars was icing on the cake.
• Republican voters are a lost cause. They finally have the prezdint (sic) they've dreamed about since LBJ and the 1964 Civil Rights Act, and they truly believe god sent him to them as the answer to their prayers during the Obama years. To them, everything Donny does is something god wants. 
• Conditions in Donny's Kiddie Koncentration Kamps are worse than people can imagine. If they weren't, the press with their cameras and microphones would be welcomed to quickly shut down the public uproar. What are they hiding? 
• Donny Ringworm has always been 50 miles of shit in a 12-inch tube, but what actually makes him dangerous is his complete ignorance and perpetual laziness. Donny's a guy who just wants to watch TV talk shows about himself and be adored by gymnasiums full of his fan club members. He gets ideas from Fox News and a few people in the White House who know how to manipulate him, like Bannon or Miller. And he answers to Putin, of course.